Best In Show

I've seen a lot of concerts... A LOT! My first concert was Depeche Mode in '86... We're talking nearly 20 years ago. Damn.

Anyhow, after seeing Kasabian at Coachella I got to thinking about my favorite concerts over the years and have come up with a list of my "Top Five Best Concerts I Have Ever Seen."

Here we go...
Suede 6/14/93 San Diego, CA

It was Suede's first tour (back when Bernard was still in the band), and it changed my life. I remember being really into the album at the time, but I wasn't fully aware of just how important this band was... at least not until the show started. Up until then, my idea of the perfect pop star (or rock star if you prefer) had been Morrissey... but as the show started and Brett Anderson shook his androgynous ass all night long to Suede's sexy Britrock music, I realized what a bore Morrissey really was! Brett was a true Messiah that night, and had he served up glasses of Kool Aid to drink... I'd have been the first in line.


Morrissey (with David Bowie) 11/18/95 London, England

I give Morrissey a lot of shit these days, but there was a time when he was "IT" for me. He had a huge influence on my teenage years and I still have a soft spot in my heart for him. Between the years of 91-95, I saw Morrissey six times. The last time was in London. It was a bit sad because he was opening for David Bowie, and it was pretty much a Bowie crowd. Us few faithful Moz fans were up in front when he came out and it was the tamest Morrissey show I had ever attended. Two cool things happened at this show though: First, he threw his tambourine out to the audience, and it now hangs proudly on my wall. Second, I decided to continue the tradition of jumping on stage and hugging Morrissey. The security barrier between stage and front row was far… and when I leaped towards the stage, the security guy grabbed my foot. I tried to pull away, but he had me… Morrissey came running over mid-song and yelled at the guy to let me go! Morrissey then pulled me on stage, I gave him a hug, and walked back around to the audience. I was the only one to get on stage that night.

I haven’t seen Morrissey live since.

Elvis Costello & Burt Bacharach 10/20/98 Los Angeles, CA

“Painted From Memory,” the Elvis Costello / Burt Bacharach collaboration was either loved or hated. It was definitely for an “older” easy listening audience, but I found myself obsessed with it. Could be because I am a huge fan of both Costello and Bacharach (minus “Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head” and “That’s What Friends Are For!”)… Anyhow, the two of them played a show along with a complete orchestra and it was (to quote Rodney Bingenheimer) “AMAAAAAZING” and “GODHEAD!” It’s not everyday you get to see two legends play on the same night. From “Alison” to “Accidents Will Happen” to “What The World Needs Now” to “I’ll Never Fall In Love Again,” these two tunesmiths dove deep into their songbooks and showed what true songwriting was all about. In today’s musical climate of mediocrity, it was an honor to be in attendance.

Pulp (with Blur) 9/24/94 Hollywood, CA

Quite possibly the best double bill in Britpop History. Blur were on the Parklife tour, and Pulp were the support act. I had a copy of "His and Hers" which I had been listening to religiously, but like Suede, I didn't quite realize the importance of one Jarvis Cocker. The majority of the crowd had never heard of Pulp and were there to see Blur, but Pulp won EVERYBODY over. With a set containing “Razzmatazz,” “Babies,” and the soon to be Britpop anthem “Common People,” Jarvis Cocker and Pulp had the audience in the palm of their hands. Jarvis would go on to sing “I am not Jesus, though I have the same initials” and it was a privilege to see him perform a miracle that night: that of turning a pretentious L.A. audience into a dancing, frenzied bunch of disco biscuits! Within a year, Jarvis would be one of the most famous names in British music and Pulp would return to Los Angeles in ’96 headlining their own sold out show. It’s nice to be able to say “I saw them back when they were just an opening band…”

Shed Seven 12/6/02 London, England

I flew to London to see this show. I figured they were never going to come to The States again (which they didn't), and I was afraid they would never release another album (which they didn't)... so I had to go. We flew all night and got to London around noon. We found our hotel, picked up the tickets, took a short rest and headed for the show. I was expecting a loyal fanbase and a great show... but I wasn't expecting 2000 Shed Seven fanatics! These were wild Brits! Beer was flying everywhere and I was soaked by the end of the first song. I remember just being overwhelmed with happiness when "On Standby" started and myself and 2000 of my new best friends were all singing happily along in London. Have a listen.

My favorite band. My favorite city. My favorite memory.


Any concerts that changed your life? List em...

Temple Of The Blog?

Sometimes I wish I weren't so opinionated. I think to myself: "What would it be like to be one of those people who like all kinds of music... the kind of people that don't hate anything?"

And then I realize... if I WERE one of those people, I'd dress crappy, have no personality, and basically just be sitting around waiting to die.

Fuck That.

So as we had PLENTY of time to kill over the weekend driving ten million miles to Coachella, my Miss and I talked A LOT about music. Naturally it was more about bands we hated than bands we liked.

Negativity is a lot more fun.

Anyhow, it was a tough one but I think I've come up with my list of "Top Five Bands I REALLY Hate." In no particular order...

Audioslave

Oh Man... This was "Hate at First Listen." From shitty Soundgarden to terrible Temple of the Dog, the tradition of crap Chris Cornell affiliated bands continues with atrocious Audioslave. I don't know why Chris Cornell continues to try and reinvent himself... it always sounds the same: LIKE SHIT! And Audioslave follows me everywhere. It's to the point now where I won't even go visit my girlfriend at work because I know that I will be forced to endure "Like a Stone" being played on Live 105. It's artists (and I use that term loosely) like Audioslave who have forced me to pack my bags and leave FM for AM Newsradio.

Pearl Jam

Grunge. Godawful Grunge. I hated it from the very beginning. The only good thing to come out of grunge was the fact that it pissed off a lot of British bands like Blur, who were fed up with the overhyped bullshit praise that grunge was receiving. The Brits in turn went on the offensive and the whole Britpop movement took off. Not that anyone who was into Grunge at the time heard it.
Anyway... Pearl Jam. Still don't understand the attraction. You've got this grovely singer who sounds like he's got something in his mouth, a maniacal gleam in his eye, full of rage, hates ticketmaster, and wears a flannel. Big deal. The only thing worse than Pearl Jam and Eddie Vedder were the countless imitators who then came onto the scene ala "Alice in Chains" and "Stone Temple Pilots." I thank God every day that Grunge is over.

Nirvana

Speaking of Grunge... Here's the one who started it all. The one I blame for everything: Kurt Cobain aka "Spokesman For My Generation." Yeah right. Fuck You! What an Asshole. As if some Heroin addicted junkie who blew his head off had anything relevant to say about my life. He should've been singing from the rooftops over the fact that he was making millions writing crap songs. Yeah, I'm sorry he died, it's a shame really. Especially since in death Kurt has become immortal and now I will be forced to listen to Nirvana the rest of my life. Thanks, Kurt. Class act Buddy.

Red Hot Chili Peppers

You know who I hate more than The Red Hot Chili Peppers? People who LIKE The Red Hot Chili Peppers. You know the type: a semi-muscular (fat-in-training) guy who wears a wife beater and a backwards baseball cap over his shaved head... oh and don't forget the baggy jeans with the boxers hanging out and finished off with a pair of gleaming white tennis shoes. Yeah, you know who I'm talking about... and then when "Under The Bridge" comes on they get all emo and say things like: "Aw yeah, this song is the jam, this song is the shit" and proceed to sing along at the top of their voices. Jesus Christ. Go fight a war.

Nickelback

I saved the worst for last. Here's a band with a horse-faced singer that takes elements from all the aforementioned bands and tries (the key word here is "tries") to put an original spin on it. Doesn't work. Instead they end up sounding like a band with a horse-faced singer who are ripping off a bunch of already shitty bands.

And then I find out that someone VERY CLOSE TO ME used to date their creepy label rep or whatever the fuck he does.

Makes me hate them even more and I hope their next album flops.

heehee.

What bands do you hate?

Oh... and don't bother trying to tell me I'm wrong and that Nirvana are great... you won't change my mind.

As a matter of fact, if you LIKE any of the bands I hate, feel free to never read my blog again.

okbye.

Dial-A-Cliche

I used to be in a band. Sadly I became a statistic as I fell into the category of bands who were on the cusp of greatness only to have their dreams ripped away due to internal band struggles...

Bitter? Maybe a little.

I've retired now, as I didn't want to become another statistic: that of the aging musician who still thinks he has a shot. Fuck that.

Anyhow, I still have a lot of contact with people in bands, and I still hear the same bullshit spewing from the mouths of those who would "rather be famous than righteous or holy... anyday anyday anydayayay."

Here's my top five list of things about bands and people in bands that really annoy me...

"We're in the Studio"
Ever notice when you ask a musician what he's been up to you get the standard "Well, we're in the studio right now recording?" That is such a load of crap! What he's really saying basically is "We're crap and have nothing going on." I don't know why people in bands are so afraid to just say they are in a lull! There aren't enough studios in the world to handle the amount of bands who are allegedly recording at the moment...

Connections
Ever hear "We're totally connected, man?" What that really means is "Our drummer's Dad works with a guy whose son's ex-wife's brother's girlfriend's cousin knows a guy who knows the roadie for the Midwest State Fair tour of REO Speedwagon and Styx minus Dennis Deyoung."

Heh.

"Let's Jam"
I hate band jargon. I could kill just about anyone who says to me: "We should get together and jam sometime." Actually, people who say that would probably say: "We should get together and jam sometime, Brother!" This is the same type of person who will close their eyes when they play guitar to "feel the music," share a microphone for backing vocals, and face their fellow band member and play their instruments at each other- inches apart ... you know what I mean... like this:


Fucking musicians, man.

Band Biographies
If there's one thing I can't stand but enjoy reading all the same, it's a band bio. Chock-full of cliche's, bands try to prove just how original they are by claiming to have the ever important "Sound All Their Own," "Pop Sensibilities," and don't forget the reference to becoming "The Next Big Thing."

Christ.

Influences
And the worst part is when you ask bands who they sound like, or if you read their bio's, they rarely ever mention the bands they REALLY sound like. They try to be a bit more obscure so as to be cooler or something... at the same time not giving credit to the bands they have TOTALLY RIPPED OFF! If you like a band enough to copy them, why not give them credit? If you sound like Joy Division, Talking Heads, Gang of Four, or The Cure (just about every new band these days!), FUCKING SAY SO!

Aw, what the hell do I know anyway? I'm just a bitter ex-musician.

What do you hate about people in bands?

Just What I Needed...

So I survived Coachella. Yes, it was really hot, yes it was really crowded, yes the food and drinks were overpriced... but you know what? I had such a good time! Lineup aside, this was my favorite Coachella to date. There have been better bands in the past, but overall this one was top shelf.

Top Five Favorite Things About The Coachella Weekend:

Kasabian

This was the best and worst part about Coachella. The best because they absolutely rocked! They completely exceeded my expectations pulling off one of the more exciting shows i've seen in quite a while... total rock stars! The bad part about seeing them was that they went on at 4pm and I was basically ready to go home after that! I knew no one else would be as good. Yes I still watched several other bands including The Arcade Fire, New Order, and The Faint, and I wish this whole blog posting could be about all the different amazing shows I saw, but none were nearly as good as Kasabian. I can't wait to see them again.

Rental Car

My car sucks! I'm greatful to have a car and all, but it still lags! Therefore to sit behind the wheel of a brand new Dodge Stratus with leather seats and a 5 disc in-dash CD player... was a small slice of heaven... ooh and did it ever go fast! It was nice to feel like I had status for a little while! When I dropped off the rental car and climbed back into my P.O.S., I felt like Cinderella with the carriage turning back into the pumpkin. Sad. I miss it already.

The Weather

I was expecting triple digits. Instead I never even saw 90. Don't get me wrong, it was still hotter than Hell, but it could've been worse. The early evening and nights were beautiful with a strong wind to cool things off. There's something about the desert at night. The sound of palm trees blowing in the wind... it's almost eerie in a peaceful way... sort of like how I picture death: uncertain yet calming and comforting all the same.

Road Trip

We had the Chewy Chips Ahoy, stopped for In-N-Out, had plenty of music, even more bathroom breaks, lots of laughs and DINOSAURS! We found those Dinosaurs that were in "Pee Wee's Big Adventure" and of course I had to bust out with: "Everyone I know has a big 'but'... Let's talk about your big 'but,' Simone."


Rejuvenation

I was really rundown prior to the weekend... bordering on burnt out! It was really nice to get away from it all, to forget about school, work, graduation, the upcoming job hunt... the rest of my life! Instead my focus this weekend was just on having fun... and I was able to achieve that. Now I'm back and still a bit sleepy, but recharged and focused and ready to finish these last few weeks of school...

And then it will be time for a REAL vacation.

"Vegas, here I come!"